Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Cryo...

It's freaking cold outside for bike riding. It's so cold, my tender bits went into cryo. I thought I had enough stuff to keep me warm, obviously not. While my brain continues to thaw itself out I may just do some rambling here.

As many may know, or not know, my romance situation has never been one to write home about. Still that way. Though during one of my many ventures into the underworld of cyberspace, I came across something that may help me. Pick-up lines. I have never tried them, so what do I have to lose? Surely not anything I haven't lost before. So here is the list I came across, I'm leaning towards number 8 as my favorite one to try:

  1. Did you fart, cause you blew me away.
  2. Are your parents retarded, 'cause you sure is special.
  3. My Love for you is like diarrhea ... I can't hold it in.
  4. Do you have a library card, 'cause I'd like to sign you out.
  5. Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them.
  6. If you and I were Squirrels, I'd store my nuts in your hole.
  7. You might not be the best looking girl here, but beauty is only a light switch away.
  8. Man - "Fat Penguin!" Woman - "WHAT?" Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."
  9. I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed-rock.
  10. I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.
  11. Your eyes are as blue as window cleaner.
  12. If you're going to regret this in the morning, we can sleep until the afternoon.
  13. Your face reminds me of a wrench, every time I think of it my nuts tighten up.

So? What's your favorite? Do you think they will help me? hehe

Maybe I should start looking for work in a warmer climate.

This Saturday is Cranksgiving! in Omaha. Hopefully there will be a big turn out, and the weather is looking like it will be just right. Mid sixties. So, if you are reading this and haven't heard of this event or have heard of it and just forgot, consider coming out. Bryan is planning some good times. He will be serving soup too. Not sure how I can eat that while riding but it will be challenging.

5 comments:

How do i get to my old stuff said...

Outta that list, I think #8 is your best bet.

As far as the cold... what are you? Some kinda pansy? ;) Wait. Pansies like it cool. It's not so bad. get some shoe covers and a wind vest, mittens if your hands suffer, then pick up your cadence and you'll be right toasty in no time. Come January, you might what to get some of those chemical warmer packets. I'm a big fan of those. :)

bryan said...

Just buy everything at the shop that looks warm. That should do it.

Or -- insider info ahead -- get some at Bike Masters on Saturday. All of their heavy-duty Pearl Izumi gloves from last year are half off.

LoupGarou said...

Syd - Yes. I am a 100% certifiable wussy when it comes to the cold. I'm not afraid to admit that. hehe

Bryan - I can buy everything at the store and I would still be cold. hehe My body just doesn't react well to cold weather. Thanks for the heads up on the Bike Masters sale. I will try to survive until Saturday.

gravy said...

Pick-up lines are not so hot in my opinion.

I find conversations work better. Just have to finagle yer way into a good one.

Butt, if you are going to use a pick-up line, make it supper lame-o. No cuss words or innuendoes. Make it lame like, "Hi." Then you can totally gauge her by her reaction whether to continue. Oh wait, I'm historically single too... neverminds.

bryan said...

You had me at hi. But you lost me when you kept staring at me.